Category Archives: Parental Musings

Reinhold 'Gaffa' Quisenberry Holt

November 14, 2017

More Parental Musings

Disciplining is about the parent virtually 100% of the time. The kids act outside the parents pre-determined ‘reactive’ parameters of acceptable behaviour.

The parents then tries to force the child through a variety…… of shall we say, ‘methods’, to conform to this pre-determined ‘reactive’ state. (Hi)

RGQH

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Reinhold 'Gaffa' Quisenberry Holt

June 6, 2017

Parental Musings

The most common thing I observe with parental behaviour is the persistence to continually try to manipulate their children into ‘doing’, what they think they should be ‘doing’.

Stop for a moment and consider the word ‘doing‘.

The common underlying word pattern nested below the behavioural pattern goes something like; ‘if you don’t do this, then I will do that‘.

I’m asking myself the question here as I sit watching my son do swimming lessons;

what if we treated our kids like intelligent beings, and we were just more patient?

Let me dig deeper, if I may. Several kids were waiting to swim listening to the instructor give some pre-swimming instructions.

One of the kids jumped up quickly and crowed like a chicken.. or perhaps a frog. I thought; ‘what is he doing?’.. which is besides point .. right? Or is it…

The kid sat down in an instant and continued to listen.

From across the room the Father said; ‘if you don’t sit down, I’ll take you home‘.

Of course the Father has probably said that many times and the reality is… he is not going to take him home, he knows… the little boy sure as hell knows it!

This pattern or rather reactive pattern, is one of the most preponderant patterns I’ve observed with parents. It often is the most justified making it deeply reactive and deeply hard to overcome.

Parents; assume a position of desirelessness, to be or not to be, focus on the word patterns, then  choose without resistance to do what you want to do without reaction, condition, or direction, which of course encompasses not doing what we want to do, which then leads us to have or not have our desired outcome.

Focus on why we are reactive and seek to purify rather than justify ourselves.

Spiritual advancement, or the growth of intelligence doesn’t happen in some far away place, away from family and friends  – it is an archetypal metaphysical polymorphism right in the moment.

It happens on the coal face right in everyday life, we just need to be willing to see it.

So the question is; what happens if we are more patient and what happens when we choose to become more intelligent.. and what happens when we are more patient, rather than reactive is listening and encouraging or kids, rather than trying to manipuate and control them.

My guess, is treating them more intelligently, makes them so.

enjoy..

RGQH – Wagin Protocol